I Think You're Perfect
by firsttimewriter105
Summary: Being transgendered, Adam was beginning to feel like he could never find someone who would love and accept him the way he is. But what happens when he meets Amelia, the all around good girl who absolutely adores him?
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note: This is my FIRST attempt at writing one of these. I really hope it isn't too terrible. I was really intrigued by Adam, and thought it'd be cool if there was a story based on him and his love life. This first chapter is really just an intro to let you know who Amelia is. I promise to make things interesting. :) Oh, and a bit longer as well lol.**

**I don't own Degrassi.**

"Clare! Hey!" Amelia shouted from the bottom step of Degrassi. She and Clare had known each other since they met at church daycare when they were 4. Due to Amelia attending a fancy all girls private school, along with being in both church and school choir, student council, and being a straight A student, they really didn't see each other outside of Sunday services and other church related things. Amelia was beautiful. Her hair was long, dark and sometimes straight, sometimes wild with curls, depending on the day. Her eyes the lightest possible shade of brown, and lips the color of a cherry popsicle. She was petite, but she carried gorgeous curves from her chest down to her hips. Her style was simple, clean cut, but with an edge. She wore a navy blue dress that came just above her knees, and a headband that had a giant peacock feather on it. Today was a crazy curly hair day.

"Oh my gosh, Amelia? What are you doing here?" Clare squealed, ecstatic to see her longtime friend.

"I just transferred to Degrassi, turns out those private school fees were a bit too much for my parents to handle."

"Oh...I'm sorry to hear that. But this is actually really great. Now we'll be able to hangout outside of church and church related activities." Clare said with a smile so sincere it could melt anyone's heart.

"Exactly what I was thinkin' Clarebear. So how about a grand tour of my new educational institution?" Said Amelia while lacing her arm through Clare's.

"Sure thing, I have to introduce you to Eli and Adam!" And they were off.


	2. Chapter 2

**Another short one. If anyone wants more, I'll write more. But it's 3 am, and I'm not fully awake right now. I promise if anyone likes this, the next chapters will be much longer. Thanks for reading.**

**I do not own Degrassi.  
**

Adam's POV

"Adam, Eli, this is my dear friend Amelia. She just transferred here so you better be nice!" Clare said smiling.

"Hey Amelia" Eli and I both said in unison.

Amelia was...gorgeous. Just being around her made me extremely nervous, and I'd only known her for 45 seconds. Oh crap! She noticed me staring. She probably thinks I'm a total creeper now.

Her eyes went from gleaming to frightened in a matter of seconds.

"Oh my gosh, I have something gross on my face don't I? Ugh I knew this would happen, I always make horrible first impressions! I shouldn't have had the extra chocolate syrup on my frap this morning but nooo I -"

"WOAH, chill. There is nothing on your face, I promise. You're good." I said with half smiling.

"Oh..heh." she said turning bright red.

She was absolutely adorable. It's too bad I'm a freak with absolutely no chance.

"I'll catch up with you guys later." I said as I hurried off. This blows.

Amelia's POV

I don't think I could have made anymore of an ass out of myself. The whole chocolate syrup thing...why must I have such severe verbal diarrhea? He hates me now. Figures I scare off the first cute guy I meet in a matter of seconds.

"I have a meeting with a guidance counselor in five...I'll see you later Clare. Nice meeting you Eli." I said as I walked off.

This. Blows.


	3. Chapter 3

**Another 3am update. :)**

It had been a few weeks since the whole "Is there something on my face?" Incident. Both she and Adam laughed it off, and Amelia was fitting in quite nicely with Adam, Clare and Eli. The more Adam got to know Amelia, the more he liked her. He was trying so hard not to, but it was not working.

Adam POV

I could never tell her . Once Amelia finds out about my...secret, I would lose all chances with her...not that I think I even have a chance now. Amelia is religious. She loves her faith. But she's also outgoing, down to earth, and seemingly open minded. She might not hate me upon finding out, but she sure as hell wouldn't date me. She's gorgeous, and could easily have any guy she wanted. What would she want with a freak like me?

It was a Friday afternoon, Adam, Eli, Amelia and Clare were at Clare's place hanging out. They were watching some stupid documentary about gorillas, and Eli and Clare were mostly making out.

"You wanna get outta here?" Amelia asked.

At first, Adam was a bit taken aback by this offer. Amelia wanted to be alone with him?

"YES." Said Adam sounding a bit too excited.

Amelia let out a little chuckle and smiled.

"We're gonna go um, do something that isn't this." Amelia announced.

"K see ya" Clare said barely taking her eyes off of Eli.

"Whatever" Eli grumbled.

"C'mon" Amelia said as she got up and grabbed her keys.

Moments later they were in Amelia's little blue car, pulling out of Clare's driveway.

"Soooo where we goin'?" Adam questioned.

"The lake. I think we need to get to know each other a little better Adam."

His heart skipped a beat, or six.

"O-oh. Okay."

Amelia POV

I wonder if im sounding too forward...too..desperate? I honestly did want to know Adam better. Wed been hanging out for weeks and i still hardly knew him. He was so quiet. I did know one thing for sure though. Adam was definitely lacking in the self confidence area. The way he walked with his head down, and how soft spoken he was. Sometimes it seemed like he even had trouble looking at me when we talked. Ive never had confidence issues myself, so it was hard for me to understand, and i really wanted to.

They pulled up to the lake parking lot and got out of the car. Amelia opened her trunk and pulled out a big blanket. It didn't take long for Adam to notice that the blanket was covered in Disney princesses. Adam chuckled. Loudly.

"What!"

"Nice blanket" he said, still laughing a little.

"You know what Adam? If you don't like it you can sit in the nasty sand. Then your butt is going to get gross, and I wont drive you home so you'll have to walk. Then on the way it will start raining and your life will suck. Your choice." She said with an evil grin.

"You know, you sure can be a monster sometimes." He said playfully to Amelia. Amelia smiled, closed her trunk, and started walking towards the sand. Adam followed close behind.


	4. Chapter 4

**I was inspired before work. Reviews por favor.**

Amelia laid out the blanket, took off her shoes and sat down. Adam quickly did the same. For the first few minutes, they were silent. Just watching the waves. After awhile, Amelia broke the silence.

"The beach is my favorite. What's weird is, I like it much better in the fall than I do in the summer. I think if I had to describe my perfect date, it'd be sitting by the water, all cozied up in blankets, talking for hours while we sipped hot chocolate. Is that lame?" She said sort of smiling.

"No..not at all."

"So Adam, all I seem to know about you is that your brother is a football star, you're Eli's wingman, and until me, you were a third wheel to the lovebirds. I wanna know things about you that aren't in relation to other people. I mean, we are friends after all."

Adam POV

She looked me right in the eyes as she said all of this, well she tried until I looked down. Nobody has ever taken a sincere interest in me until now. It made me feel...so good. She wanted to know me. This beautiful, intelligent, and overall work of art wanted to know ME. The sad part is, I had no clue what to say. Did I even know myself?

"You seem to be stuck Adam. Is something wrong?"

"No...its just...I don't really know what to say. Its kind of hard for me to just talk about myself." Adam said while he fidgeted with his hands and looked away.

"Well then...I guess I'll have to learn from experience." Amelia said smiling at him. With that, she stood up and held her hand out to him.

"Lets go get our feet wet." Amelia said sternly. As if she wouldn't take no for an answer.

"Um alright." Amelia helped Adam up, and she let her hand linger in his a bit too long. When Adam noticed this, both of their faces turned bright shades of red. She smiled awkwardly, and ran towards the water.

Adam and Amelia stayed at the beach until it was dark, and they could hardly see. Those few hours were fairly educational for Amelia. She was able to learn that Adam was not a fan of cold water being splashed in his face, he found it absolutely hilarious when Amelia fell in and got completely soaked, he was horrible at playing I-Spy, and he loved chocolate ice cream. He liked it even more when Amelia paid.

Amelia pulled into Adam's driveway. Adam spoke.

"I had a lot of fun...it was really nice not being a third wheel for once."

Amelia smiled. "I had fun too. I say we do it again tomorrow, and I'll even let you choose what we do."

"Hm, you've got yourself a deal. I'll call you?" Adam was shocked at his sudden confidence boost. Since when was he so forward?

"You better."

With that, Adam got out of the car and waved. He could not wait until tomorrow.

When Adam walked in, Drew and Alli were sitting on the couch watching a movie.

"Hey guys."

"YOU TOTALLY LIKE AMELIA!" Alli squealed.

"Wait..what? How'd you..what?"

"Um. We were kind of watching you two through the window." Drew confessed smirking.

"You should have seen the look on your face when she drove off dude. I'm surprised your shirt isn't soaked in drool."

"We're just friends. NOTHING more." Adam said as he ran up the stairs.

"Yeah whatever Rico Suave" Drew shouted after him.

Amelia POV

I walked in to find an empty house. There was a note on the table. "Amelia, Aunt Christine went into labor! Dad and I drove out to Wasaga soon as we heard, sorry we didn't wait for you! We probably won't be home until tomorrow afternoon. I left you food money on your night stand. Call me ASAP. -xo Mom."

I called my mom.

She informed me that I had a new baby cousin named Ethan, and he was gorgeous. She and dad were staying out there for the night and they would be home before 3 tomorrow. I hated nothing more than being home alone. It creeped me out so bad. I texted Clare.

Amelia: Hey Clarebear, what're you up to?

Clare: Eli and I decided to catch a late movie, ttyl.

Ugh. Eli Eli Eli...Adam.

Amelia: Hey you, I know we've only been apart for like...20 minutes. But I miss you already. :p Come over? I'll pick you up.

Adam POV

I just stared at my phone. This was undoubtedly too good to be true.


	5. Chapter 5

Adam: um, sure. When will you be here?

Amelia: on my way. See you in ten.

Adam POV

I went downstairs to tell my mother where I was going. Only, I changed Amelia to Eli. I didn't want my parents to say no. Despite me being pumped about Amelia already wanting to hang out again, I was a bit confused. Why so soon? There has to be a reason other than"she missed me." I mean, that would be awesome, but I wasn't about to believe that was all. I changed my clothes, at first I hesitated, thinking she would think I was trying too hard, but we went to the beach. Sandy clothes. That was a good enough cover up right? I changed into a baggy pair of khakis, and a gray t-shirt. Over it, my favorite black hoodie. I looked down at my phone, Amelia texted me. She said she was parked two houses down. I asked her to in case my parents decided to look out and realize I wasn't going to Eli's. I quickly sprayed some of Drew's cologne, and ran out the door yelling a quick "I'mleavingbye!" As I went.

I got into Amelia's car.

"Thanks for coming over." Amelia said smiling.

"No problem but...is something wrong? I mean, I know you didn't miss me THAT much." I said with a nervous laugh.

"There isn't anything wrong, I just hate being alone. Especially at night, and my parents are gone until tomorrow. Can you believe they just left without calling me? Both of them have cell phones, yet my mom thought it'd be better to just leave a note. I swear sometimes she acts as if we're living in the 50's."

I laughed.

"It isn't funny." She said pouting "they abandoned their sweet little angel and left her to fend for herself!"

"Don't worry, you have me." I said.

Woah, another random boost of confidence?

"Well, thank God for that huh?" She said jokingly.

We got to her house. It was fairly large, and the inside looked like something out of better homes and gardens. Everything was so...perfect.

"Wow um..nice place."

"I told you, my mom thinks she's June Cleaver."

She gave me a little tour. Kitchen, living room, dining room, bathroom, then finally, her room. The walls were turquoise, and her bedding black and white, along with her curtains. Her bed was huge, and covered in pillows. Her bedding had small delicate black and white flowers all over it. She had a small entertainment center, and a huge pile of DVD's next to it. Her desk was extremely neat, with a pink laptop sitting on top. On her night stand was a black lamp, and...money?

"I'm going to take a shower. You can use my computer if you want, or watch tv...or whatever. Make yourself comfortable, I'll try to make it quick."

I didn't do either of those things. I just sat on her bed, and looked at some girly magazine that was sitting on it. I thought about all the times my mother would buy these for me. She tried so hard to get me interested in that stuff, but rather than reading about make overs, and the latest back to school fashions, I'd find myself more interested in the pretty girls. Occasionally I would read the advice columns. It was a good way to learn how a real girls mind worked. If I was ever going to get a girlfriend, I would need some help. Even though I was born a female, I was completely clueless as to how a girls mind worked, because I was never really a girl. I'm not a girl. And I pray to god that Amelia would understand that.

After about ten minutes of waiting, I decided to have a little fun. I went and stood outside the bathroom door. I heard the water stop running. I silently laughed to myself. As I heard the doorknob turn, and saw her open it up...

"RAAAAA!" I screamed.

"Ahhhhh!" Amelia squealed. She had such a girly scream.

"Adam you ass!" She smacked my arm hard. "I nearly peed myself. You're a terrible friend!" I was still laughing. That is until I noticed Amelia was wearing nothing but a towel. I immediately stopped.

"What? Never seen a lady in a towel before?" She smiled, rolled her eyes, and headed towards her room.

I followed.

"Turn around and face the door, she demanded."

"Okay, but the door has a mirror on it." I said.

"Ugh well cover your eyes then!"

So I turned around, and covered my eyes with my hands. I heard a drawer open and close, After a minute she told me I could uncover my eyes.

"I um..woah...I'm sorry I thought you said I could..um.."

Amelia was wearing nothing but a pink bra and a pair of little black shorts.

"What? It's just a bra. No difference from a bra and a bathing suit if you ask me." she shrugged and rummaged around another drawer. Unfortunately looking for a shirt.

She put on a solid white V-neck, and sat next to me on the bed.

"So do you wanna order Chinese or pizza or something? I'm starved and my parents left me some money for food.

That explained the money on the night stand I thought.

"Sure, whatever you want."

"Fantastic" she said, and got up.

We ended up ordering pizza AND Chinese, because Amelia couldn't decide what she wanted. By the time we'd finished eating, it was nearly midnight. I looked at the time nervously, and she noticed.

"Do you want to go home?" She asked.

"No..I mean it's just..it's late..."

"Oh...well I was hoping you'd stay over..." my heart started pounding.

"Pleasssse?" she batted her eyes at me as if I needed any convincing.

"S-sure." I managed to stutter.


	6. Chapter 6

Amelia POV

I'm so glad he's staying.

Adam POV

Amelia and I were sitting on her patio, just talking and listening to the crickets.

"Tell me a secret" she said. "Something extremely interesting. And I will share one of mine."

My heart started racing. Did she know? Was she trying to get it out of me? And if she didn't know, what would she think if I told her? I'm not ready.

"You first." I said hesitantly.

"Fine. Well, I don't know if you knew, or couldn't tell by my house, but my parents are very...religious, and practical. And I try so hard Adam, I get the grades, I go to church, I do everything they ask. But deep down...I'm not the girl that they want me to be." she said staring off into the night. It was Dark, but I could see the sadness building in her eyes.

"What do you mean?" I asked gently putting my hand on hers. I was scared she'd push it away. Instead, she ran her thumb over mine. My heart melted.

"I'm just not the little angel that they would like to believe I am. I believe in God Adam, I do. But some of the things that they want me to believe in...I just can't, and I know that if I ever told them how I really felt about things I would disgust them. Every time I'm myself, I feel this unbearable guilt. I just want to be able to show my parents who I really am. And I want them to accept it, and love me regardless...I'm an outsider in my own home."

If only she knew. If only she knew how similar we really were. I knew the exact feeling she was going through. I know exactly what it's like to disappoint your parents, to feel alienated by the people who you desperately want to accept you. To feel like who you were, was something to be looked down upon.

She looked at me. I saw a tear fall down her face. I wiped it away.

"I'm sorry..." she said and sniffled. "I didn't mean to get so emotional."

"It's okay. Ready for my secret?" I said. Should I tell her?

"Absolutely."

"I like you Amelia" ...Did I really just say that?

At first she just looked away silently, and I felt my heart sink.

She turned back towards me, and before I knew it, she was leaning in to me. was shaking, my heart was pounding, and I had no idea what to do, so I stayed completely still. She smiled softly, and then, her lips were on mine. They were soft, and tasted like cherry cola. The kiss was sweet, and so gentle. I had always imagined my first kiss to awkward, and gross. But this, this was amazing.

She pulled away. "I like you too." she whispered. And kissed me again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hope you're enjoying. :)**

Adam POV

Amelia pulled away for a second time. This time, she sat all the way back in her seat, and closed her eyes.

"Adam, I hope you don't think I brought you here to seduce you."

I could hear the playfulness in her voice.

"Damn." was all I said.

We walked up to her bedroom. She gave me a pair of basketball shorts, and one of her dad's t-shirts to sleep in.

"I um...I have to use the bathroom" I said and hurried out. No way I could just change in front of her. I could only imagine. What's that you say Amelia? Oh, those are just my bandaged down breasts. Why don't I have a penis you say?...I was disgusted at the thought.

I walked back in her room to find her already under the covers.

"You may sleep with me in my bed, but no funny business sir. We haven't even established the status of our relationship yet." she said sarcastically. "I mean, we definitely shouldn't even be sleeping together. It's not even face book official."

I laughed, and crawled in next to her. Amelia turned around to face me.

"Goodnight Adam. I apologize in advance for the kicking, and blanket stealing you may endure throughout the night." with that, she turned away. I swear she fell asleep instantly, because her breathing became even, and when I said "Goodnight Amelia." I got no response. I just laid there, listening to the patterns of her breath and the sounds of the night for awhile. At that moment, things were absolutely perfect. Well. Almost perfect.

Amelia POV

Adam thought I was asleep. I was sure of it. But really, I was wide awake. I wanted so badly to crawl into his arms, and listen to his heart beat. I wanted to him to hold me. But even more, I wanted to hold him. But I couldn't. I knew he wasn't ready for that kind of intimacy. Adam was hiding something from me, and I so badly wanted to know. For now though, I'll take what I can get. Happily.

The next morning Adam and Amelia woke up exactly how they had fallen asleep. Only, Amelia was wrapped like a burrito in the blanket, and Adam was left uncovered and shivering. Amelia unwrapped herself, sat up, and yawned.

"Isholdyoukiwashabanklethog" she groaned out.

"Wha?" Adam said confused.

"I told you I was a blanket hog" she giggled.

Amelia looked at the time. 10:13 A.M.

"Let's go eat breakfast. I make a mean bowl of cereal." she said as she got up and headed towards her bedroom door.

Together they ate breakfast and talked. Nothing heavy, just things like how Amelia eats so much yet stays so skinny. Why Adam wears all his pants fourteen sizes too big. And how sickening Eli and Clare could be sometimes. Last nights confessions, and last nights kiss had yet to come up.

"Adam...I think we should take things slow, get to know each other before we rush into anything."

"I completely agree Adam said."

Adam POV

I'm not sure if I felt relieved, or disappointed. I mean, yes Amelia and I still had so much to learn about each other, but to have a girlfriend? My very own girl to hold hands with at school, to kiss anytime I wanted...well that was what I wanted. I wanted Amelia.

School. Shit. What would people at school say if they saw us together as a couple? Someone would most definitely tell Amelia about...me. And she would be hurt that she didn't hear it from me. Disgusted. Betrayed. She wouldn't want me. And aside from that...the taunting. The jokes. The ugly words that would be tossed at her. "She's dating a freak so she must be one". I could not do that to her. Amelia was an angel, and she deserved so much better.

I had to save her. I had to save us both from the inevitable pain that would be thrown at both of us.

"Actually Amelia...maybe last night was a mistake. I gotta go."

I walked towards the front door.

"Adam wait, what are you talking about?"

"I'm sorry Amelia. I don't like you, and I shouldn't have said that."

The look on her face. Pure devastation. What had I done?

I walked out the front door. And started walking, leaving the most wonderful girl I'd ever met behind.

I hate myself.


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry for the delay in updates. I start college next week and everything has been a little hectic. I will have another chapter up sometime tonight, I promise. But first, I must go to work. Also why is Adam and Drew's mom such a bitch? Poor Alli. :(**

Amelia POV

I just didn't get it. Whatever Adam was hiding...was it really worth hurting me over? Was it worth walking away from something that could potentially be great? I don't know. What I did know is that I wouldn't cry over this. Nope. Not a single tear...well maybe just one.

Adam POV

I ran all the way home. I needed to get away as quickly as possible. How could I do that to her? How could I not? Amelia deserved better than me. Besides, once she knew she would regret ever kissing me.

When I got home, I ran straight to my room ignoring the hellos from my parents and brother. Once the door was closed, I cried. Uncontrollably. I sobbed until I completely drained my body of tears. Why me? Why did everything have to be one billion times harder for me? I finally had a chance at happiness, and I blew it. My body blew it.

Both Amelia and Adam spent the afternoon in their bedrooms, thinking about each other until they fell asleep.

The next day was Monday. That meant school. School meant Adam and Amelia having to face each other.

Amelia woke up happy to see such a nice day. That is until she remembered what happened yesterday. Her smile faded, and she slowly got out of bed.

"Good morning sweetie," her mom came in. "Sorry we missed you last night, your father and I decided to go to Sunday evening mass with the family out there. We didn't get in till after midnight and I didn't want to wake you. I assume you just went to churrch with the Edwards?"

Amelia POV

Shit. Church. It completely slipped my mind.

"Uh, um yeah I did." I said and smiled.

"Great. I'll see you downstairs sweetie, I'm making you pancakes to make up for you having to eat out two days in a row! Come down as soon as you're ready."

Great. My mother being so nice to me made me feel 10x worse about skipping out on church. I decided I wanted to look nice today. I felt miserable on the inside, so I should at least look good on the outside. I made sure my hair was bouncy, my clothes were new, and my make up was perfect. I was never really into wearing much make up. Just something light and natural to highlight my eyes and lips, with a touch of blush. Perfect. Most importantly though, I made sure my skin smelled sweet. Tantalizing even, so when I approached Adam to talk, he wouldn't be able to walk away from me. I smiled, satisfied with my reflection and walked down the stairs to have breakfast.

Adam POV

I woke up dreading school. I was sure Amelia hated me. Along with her hatred came curiosity I'm sure. She would want answers, and I wasn't ready to give her any. I didn't know if I ever would be.

"Mom, I'm sick, can I stay home?"

"Dream on Adam, now get up and get dressed. We're leaving in ten."

"Great" I thought. I straightened my hair a little. Threw on a beanie and the same outfit I was wearing yesterday and sauntered down the stairs and out the door. This wasn't going to be my day.

Amelia and Adam both arrived to school at the same time. Amelia getting out of her little blue car, Adam exiting his mothers van. Amelia glanced his way. It was hard for Adam not to notice the hurt and confusion in her eyes. He couldn't take it. He ran inside the school, and went straight to class complete disregarding Clare and Eli. Today, he just wanted to be left alone.

Amelia walked into school and looked around. No Adam in sight, but there was Clare, and of course Eli.

"Hey guys" I said, forcing a smile.

"Hey." they said in unison.

"Clare, can I um, talk to you? Alone?"

"Hint taken." Eli said. He kissed Clare's cheek and walked away.

"What's up?" Clare said.

"Adam came over and he said he liked me then we kissed two times! And then he slept over and we even shared a bed! But don't worry Clare, nothing happened. But then the next day I made us this awesome cereal breakfast and right in the middle of it he tells me that everything was a mistake and he doesn't like me and left! Clare! What is going on? What do I do?" Amelia said all of this in a matter of 7 seconds.

"Woah woah woah, slow down!" Clare said. "You and Adam kissed?"

"Yes."

"And he slept over?"

"Yes."

"And then he said it was a mistake and left?"

"Yes."

"And you haven't talked to him since?"

"Yes...I mean no. I mean. We haven't talked."

"Well Amelia maybe he just got freaked out, I mean, under the circumstances."

"Wait...what circumstances?"

"He didn't..oh boy..I shouldn't have said that Amelia. Please forget I said that."

"Clare! What circumstances?"

"Amelia, if Adam hasn't told you then he's not ready, and it isn't my place to tell you for him. I'm really sorry. If Adam wants you to know, then you will." Clare gave Amelia a weak apologetic smile. Amelia just stared at Clare, the same hurt and confusion in her eyes that Adam saw this morning.

The bell rang, and they both headed off to class.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you all for reading. :) I will update tomorrow evening. I think you'll really like the next few chapters. **

Adam POV

Despite Amelia and I having no classes together, avoiding her wasn't easy. Especially since we sat with the same people at lunch. And lucky me, lunch time came quicker than it ever has.

"Hey guys." Adam said to Eli and Clare. "Um, where's Amelia?"

"She's in the library, she said she wanted to be alone. She's been pretty upset all day. Adam I can't believe you kissed her and didn't even tell her!"

"Woah now, she kissed me!"

Clare just gave Adam an "oh please" kind of look. Adam sighed.

"Look, I know it was wrong not to tell Amelia, but if she knew she wouldn't want anything to do with me. Not romantically at least. And when we kissed...it was like nothing I've ever felt before. I can't let myself like her anymore Clare, and I can't let her like me. It'll just end up hurting the both of us." Adam frowned and put his head in his hands. He felt like crying, breaking something, screaming, running. He felt like going right up to Amelia and telling her how incredibly sorry he was for hurting her.

"Dude. If you don't want to tell her, fine. Clare and I have no say in that, but you owe her an explanation, and a damn good one." Eli said sternly to Adam.

"Whatever, I'll catch up with you two later." Adam said as he got up. "I'm going to the library."

Amelia POV

It was clear Adam didn't trust me enough to tell me what was going on. It made me feel so...angry, hurt, disappointed even. I know we've only known each other a month, but I truly thought there was something there. I felt so stupid. I decided against trying to talk to Adam. If he didn't want to be honest with me, then I didn't want anything to do with him. Oh shit. There he is, walking towards me.

Adam entered the library, and immediately spotted Amelia staring off into space.

"Probably thinking about how much she hates me." he thought to himself. She looked pissed.

Adam sat directly across from Amelia. She didn't even look his way.

"Amelia, can we plea-"

"SH!" Adam was cut off by the sound of the librarian "sh"-ing him. So rather than talking, Adam scribbled on a piece of paper.

"I'm sorry. Can we please talk outside?"

He shoved the note to Amelia, and she read it. Without a word, or even a glance his way, she stood up and headed towards the doors. Adam followed.

"Me first." Amelia said. Adam nodded.

"You know what Adam? I know you like me, so don't bother saying you don't. But I also know that you're hiding something. And you know what? It REALLY hurts me that you can't trust me enough to tell me. And that you just walked out on me like that. Why would you do that? How could you do that? I put myself out there and you just..." Amelia stopped herself once she felt a tears swell in her eyes. She looked away.

"Amelia...please. Please don't cry."

She just looked up at him.

"I'm not crying." she looked at her feet. She looked anywhere to avoid Adam's eyes. She was so embarrassed. He hardly knew her yet he was still having this affect on her.

Adam POV

The pain in her eyes was almost unbearable to look at. For the first time, I was thankful that she refused to look at me.

"Look I really have to tell you something, and then maybe you'll understand why I did what I did." this was it. I was going to tell her that I'm transgendered, she was going to slap me, tell me I'm disgusting, and run away. I just knew it.

"I..I'm..I..."

"You what? Spit it out." She said with such annoyance and anger in her tone.

"I...I have a girlfriend." I spat out. I just couldn't do it.

"You what?" Amelia said, her face turning bright red.

"Yeah um, I have a girlfriend. Her name is Katherine and she goes to another school. I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."

-slap!- right across my face.

"I deserved that." I thought.

"You know what Adam?" Amelia said, venom in her tone. The anger in her eyes was almost scary. "Just...don't ever talk to me again."

She walked away from me. Remember when I hated myself before? I hate myself one thousand times more now.


	10. Chapter 10

**I apologize for how short this is. Please continue Reading/Reviewing. **

Adam POV

I had to do it. It was the only thing I could think of that would make her hate me. God, I feel like such a dick. But it's better this way, isn't it?

"Eli! Wait up!" I shouted from across the hall. He stopped walking and waited for me to catch up.

"So how did things go with Amelia dude?"

"I think I screwed things up even more man..."

"What? How is that even possible?"

"I sorta told her I had a girlfriend and that's why I couldn't see her."

"How stupid can you be?"

"Thanks for the support I guess." Adam said looking at Eli with disdain.

"I'm sorry I just don't think that was the right thing to do." said Eli looking apologetic.

"I know. But it's too late to make things right. I ruined everything." Adam said.

"Looks like it may be." Eli said with a look of pure shock on his face.

"What're you looking at?" Adam questioned

Amelia POV

I walked as quickly away from Adam as possible. I still had 15 minutes left of lunch, and I really didn't want anyone to see me let out the tears that I felt swelling up in my eyes, so I ran into the nearest bathroom. I cried. I cried for a good seven and a half minutes, and damn did it feel good. Once I was finished with my moment of weakness, I checked myself in the mirror. I was a wreck, but what did it matter? I walked out of the bathroom and started quietly talking to myself.

How could he just cheat on his girlfriend like that? What a dick. What an asshole! And Clare...how could she just not tell me? Some friend right? I don't think I can trust either of them ever again. Nope.

I was so busy talking to myself that I hadn't realized where I was walking and completely crashed into another person. Books went flying and I looked like a huge idiot.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry." I said as I scrambled to pick up my books as well as the belongings of the person I just nearly killed.

"Watch where you're going damn you coulda-" he cut himself off when I looked up at him.

"I'm really sorry." I said again.

"Hey..it's cool. I'm sorry I acted like such a dick before, you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine...I just kinda dazed off I guess." Amelia said as she looked at him then looked away.

"Have you been crying?" the mystery man asked, with slight sincerity in his voice.

"No...just..allergies." she said unconvincingly.

"Yeah okay like I haven't heard that a million times before. It's about as believable as my dad ate my homework" he said playfully rolling his eyes.

Amelia laughed.

"Isn't it my DOG ate my homework?" she said while still laughing.

"Yeah haha I guess it is" he said smiling "but I wanted to make you smile, and it worked."

Amelia smiled and bit her lip.

"So can I walk you to class" said the seemingly charming young gentleman.

"Absolutely" Amelia said "I'm Amelia by the way."

"Mark Fitzgerald. But everyone just calls me fitz."

**Dun dun dun! Amelia and Fitz? Hmmmm**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you all SO much for reading/reviewing/subscribing. I really appreciate it. Keep doing that and I will have another chapter up tomorrow. I CAN'T wait for the next chapter, and I already have a sequel to this story in mind. :)**

Adam POV

I couldn't believe it. Amelia and Fitz were walking down the hall together, and she looked pretty damn happy. What had I done? I blew every chance with this girl I could potentially fall in love with, and now she's prancing around with my worst enemy. I was crushed. I crushed her. I deserved what I was feeling. But Fitz? He's such a creep. I couldn't bare the thought of him touching her...kissing her...hurting her. I had to do something about this.

Amelia POV

Fitz was cute, but I didn't find him attractive. I guess I was just hoping that Adam would see us around and feel bad for what he did.

Fitz walked me to class, and we exchanged phone numbers. While I was in class I received a text from him asking if I wanted to hang out after school. I was hesitant at first,because I wasn't quite sure how great of an idea this was. Adam and I weren't dating, but Fitz was no doubt a rebound. Eventually I agreed and we decided to meet at the Dot at 4. He was 25 minutes late, and I thought about leaving. Finally though, he showed up.

"Sup. Sorry I'm late" He said as he sat next to me.

"It's fine." I lied.

"So um. How was your day?" Fitz asked awkwardly.

"It was bullshit, till I nearly killed you of course" I said smiling.

"You pretty much trampled me. You definitely owe me a milkshake" he said winking. I suppose he was implying that he wanted me to pay. That's fine, I thought to myself. I did run over him with my body after all. Fitz and I sat at the Dot for a good hour before I realized we had absolutely nothing in common and nothing to talk about. That was until Adam walked in.

Adam POV

They're on a date. They're on a fucking date. I was absolutely infuriated. Not at her, and not even myself. I guess it was just the sight of Amelia with Fitz that made my blood boil. I decided against approaching them, well not yet at least.

Amelia POV

"Oh God, Adam." I thought to myself.

"You looking at that queer?" Fitz said when he noticed me staring.

I just looked at him strangely and changed the subject. Adam had to see Fitz and I flirting.

"You look so handsome in that shirt." I complimented as a ran my hand lightly down his chest, one eye on Adam while I did it. Adam was looking at me too. I could feel it.

"Well babe you're lookin' pretty sexy in that dress yourself." Fitz said scooting a little bit too close to me.

I moved away.

"What's wrong? You a tease or something?" Fitz said, his voicing becoming harsh. He slid his hand up my dress.

"Don't touch me like that!" I shouted.

Adam POV

I can't believe she just touched hs chest like that. I couldn't stand it anymore. I had to get out of there. I was about to get ready to leave until I heard Amelia shout. What the hell does he think he's doing? I ran over there.

"Dude, what the hell do you think you're doing? Don't you ever touch her!" I said with such anger in my voice.

"Look faggot, get the hell away from me and mind your own business."

"How about you try keeping your grimy hands to your self you ignorant piece of shit." I snapped.

As this was going on Amelia had stood up and stepped away from the table.

"Both of you, stop. Let's all just leave." she said pleadingly.

That didn't stop them.

"Look bitch, I already told you I don't hit grls, but I'm so close to going against my word and knocking you the fuck out" Fitz said stepping closer to Adam.

"Fitz, stop it!" Amelia shouted as she stepped in between the both of them.

"What the hell is wrong with you Amelia?" Fitz said. "Why are you sticking up for this shemale freak?"

Before Amelia or Adam had a chance to respond the manager of the Dot was heading towards them to kick them all out.

"Whatever man. You two can enjoy being lesbians together. I'm outta here." Fitz said as he hurried out of the restaurant.

The look on Amelia's face was almost indescribable. It was a mixture of confusion, shock, and disgust. Adam didn't know what to do, so he did what he knew best. He ran. He ran straight out of the restaurant and towards his house.

Amelia threw a twenty dollar bill on the table, and ran out after Adam. By the time she got out there he had gotten fairly far. She got in her car, and followed him.


	12. Chapter 12

**:) you guys are theee best.**

Amelia POV

What did Fitz mean, and why did he hate Adam so much? The comments about being a girl...that was just teasing right? But then it all started to make sense. Adam's extremely baggy clothing, his..or her..soft small hands...the way Adam wouldn't change in front of me. Was Adam a girl? A lesbian?

Eventually after ten minutes of running, Adam ended up at the park. Amelia wasn't far behind.

"Crap." He mumbled to himself. He gave up on running away and sat on a nearby bench. He heard Amelia's car door slam and cringed.

"Care to tell me what the hell is going on Adam?" She said as she approached the bench he was sitting on.

Adam was silent.

"Okay I guess I will just go ahead and ask" Amelia said as she sat next to him. At first she was unsure of how to say it, the words to use. After all, this had to be an extremely sensitive topic. Finally, she blurted it out.

"Are you a girl?" she said quickly, slightly embarrassed at the words leaking out of her mouth.

"I'm not a girl!" Adam shouted. "Please, don't ever say that. Please." He begged as he stood up and started walking away.

"Then what was Fitz talking about Adam? What is going on?" She shouted as she followed him.

Adam turned around to face Amelia, tears were pouring out of his eyes.

"Adam..." she said softly.

"Gracie..." he mumbled and looked away.

"What? Who is Gracie?"

Amelia was so confused. What was going on?

"Lets sit down." Adam said as he headed back towards the bench. For the first few moments they were silent. It was taking a lot for Adam to get this out. Could you blame him?

"Amelia I...I'm not a girl. I mean. I guess technically I am. "

"I don't understand." Amelia was taken aback, and was becoming more and more freaked out.

"I'm transgendered."

Amelia didn't say anything. She stared at Adam with a confused look on her face.

"When I was born my parents named me Gracie and it wasn't until I was a little older that I realized something was wrong. I may have had a girls body, but I knew it was wrong. I wasn't a girl. I'm not a girl, and I never will be a girl. Just recently my parents have accepted me for who I am, and accepted that I want to live my life as Adam...not Gracie. When I was Gracie life was miserable. I felt like a liar. I felt trapped. When I finally became Adam things for me became harder yes, but they also became easier. My life was finally going right. And then I met you..."

Amelia didn't say anything. She just stared straight ahead, her expression blank.

"I am so sorry I lied to you Amelia. I was terrified that you'd hate me. I shouldn't have let you kiss me." Adam said as he put his head down.

They were silent for a few more moments after that. Finally, Amelia spoke.

"Did everyone know but me?" She questioned softly.

"Yes..."

"I have to go." Amelia said as she stood up. "I'll um see you tomorrow." With that, Amelia walked away, leaving Adam alone and heart broken.

Adam POV

I felt like screaming. I felt like running. I felt like getting hit by a car, and having every single one of my bones shattered. Amelia leaving proved it. It proved that no woman would ever love me. I didn't deserve to be loved. I was a fucking homo freak.

By now, Adam's entire body was trembling. His breathing slow and heavy, the tears pouring out of his eyes. Right now, Adam didn't want to be alive. He stood up and walked away from the bench, towards the street.

His phone started ringing. It was Eli.

"Yeah." was all Adam said when he answered.

"Whats up man?"

"I told Amelia Eli."

"Oh wow...how did she take it?" Eli asked.

"She hates me. She just left me, without saying two words."

Eli was beginning to hear Adam's voice bcoming thick with anger and irrationality.

"Dude, where are you? I'm coming to get you right now." Eli was concerned. He knew Adam was going to do something stupid.

"I'm at the park Eli, but I won't be here for long."

"Where are you going Adam?"

"I'm going to find Fitz" Adam said.

"No! Adam don-" was all Eli could get out before Adam hung up.


	13. Chapter 13

**Please blame college for my lack of update. :( But since you waited so patiently, I have TWO chapters tonight. :)**

After Adam hung up with Eli, he started walking towards the alley by the Dot. That's where Fitz and his goons usually hung out. As he walked, tears were running down his face, and his heart was pounding. His fists were clamped so tight that they were turning white. Never in Adam'as life had he felt so disgusted and ashamed of himself. He hated Amelia. He hated Fitz. He hated himself. Would he ever be understood? Accepted?

"No." he thought aloud to himself.

Adam finally arrived at the Dot and began looking around for Fitz. It wasn't long until he heard that sickening tone of voice.

"Well look who we have here." Fitz said nearing Adam.

"I need a favor." Adam said.

"What the hell makes you think I'd do anything for you freak?" Fitz retorted.

"I think you'll like this." Adam said, no tone in his voice, no expression on his face. " I want you beat me until I'm unconscious."

Amelia POV

I...what..a girl...transgendered...a boy?

I just couldn't believe what Adam just told me. I mean, I knew what being transgendered meant, but it was so mind boggling...to be trapped in the wrong body. I never thought I'd meet someone in that situation, let alone have feelings for someone like that. Strong feelings. I guess what was freaking me out more was the fact that despite his lies, despite him not technically being a boy...all I felt like doing was kissing him. I still really liked Adam.

"Oh God." I said aloud.

I just walked away from him. I left him there. How could I do that? He hates me. I'm sure of it.

"I have to find him."

As Amelia was turning around, she heard her phone ring. It was...Eli?

"Hello?" Amelia answered.

"Amelia! You have to help me find Adam! I think he went to fight Fitz!"

"Oh my God." Amelia's heart stopped. "The Dot. Eli that's where they should be. Hurry!"

Amelia hung up and presses the gas. She had to find Adam.

"What the hell?" Fitz said to Adam. "Are you insane dude?"

"No. You want me dead Fitz, just go ahead and fucking do it!" Adam shouted as he shoved Fitz.

"Back off!" Fitz yelled back pushing Adam and knocking him down. "Just stay the fuck away from me freak." he said as he walked away shaking his head. Just then Adam heard a car door slam, then another following it.

"Adam!" Amelia and Eli shouted simultaneously.

Both Amelia and Eli ran to Adam as soon as they saw he was on the ground.

"Oh my gosh, are you okay?" Amelia said exasperated. She was crying.

"Dude you're insane!" Eli shouted." What were you even thinking? You're lucky Fitz didn't destroy you!"

"I'm fine." Adam said getting up. "Just leave me alone." he said as he started walking away from both of them.

"I think I cant take it from here..." Amelia said looking at Eli.

"Alright." Eli said nodding his head. "Thanks for coming." He said patting her shoulder, the retreating to his car.

"Adam! Adam wait!" Amelia shouted after him. She could hardly keep up. "Would you please just stop?" Amelia shouted again. Finally, Adam stopped in his tracks.

"What do you want Amelia?" He said quietly.

"I want you to come over." She said hesitantly.

"Why?" Adam said. Amelia could hear the hurt and anger in his voice.

"Just...please." Amelia softly pleaded.

"Okay. Whatever." Adam said. They headed towards the car.


	14. Chapter 14

**The moment you've all been waiting for. 3**

The car ride with Amelia and Adam had to be the most awkward either of them had ever experienced. Aside from the occasional street noise, it was silent. Adam had no idea what to say, and Amelia was saving her words for when they got to her house.

Adam and Amelia arrived at her house, and Amelia led Adam straight to her bedroom.

"Sit down." she instructed as they entered her bedroom. Adam did as he was told and sat down on her bed. Amelia stayed standing.

"Why did you lie?" was the first thing she said to Adam.

"Because I knew you'd want nothing to do with me, and I knew it would make you regret ever kissing me." Adam said. Amelia could see the shame in his eyes. "And you know what Amelia? You just walking away from me like that just proves how right I was."

"What did you expect Adam?" Amelia said, her tone becoming angry. " You can't just drop a bomb like that on me and expect me not to be freaked out."

"So I freak you out." Adam said.

"No! I mean..I...Adam no." Amelia stuttered. She didn't know the right words to use at all.

"Look. Why did you bring me here? To tell me nicely how much you hated me? What a freak I am? I already know. So just let me leave." Adam spat out as he stood up.

"No!" Amelia said walking towards him. Her frustration was becoming more and more intense. "Sit down!"

Adam rolled his eyes and sat back down.

"Adam. I liked you. I REALLY liked you. And then you just blew me off. Then you told me you had a girlfriend. THEN you told me that you're a man trapped in a woman's body. How can you POSSIBLY expect me to be okay with all this? You lied to me. You completely crushed me." Amelia's eyes were swelling up, and Adam was beginning to feel worse.

"Amelia...when I left you. When I lied about having a girlfriend...I thought I was protecting you. I realize I was doing the opposite and I'm sorry. But I have no idea what to do to make anything better. You know now. You know how fucked up I am. And you know why being with me would be emotional and social suicide for you. I'm not a REAL guy, and you that's what you deserve."

Amelia looked up at him just as the tears started falling, and just shook her head.

"I just don't know what to think Adam..." she said slowly collapsing to the floor, and sitting on her legs. Adam stood up, and went to sit next to Amelia on the floor. He made sure to keep his distance.

"Don't think anything." he said softly. "Hate me all you want. But the last thing I want is for you to cry and hurt over me. I'm not worth it."

"But you are..." Amelia said softly, looking at her hands. "That's why I brought you here."

"What do you mean?" Adam questioned.

Amelia crawled much closer to Adam, and sat next to him so that their legs were touching.

She looked him in the face, because his eyes were unavailable as usual.

"You're a REAL guy Adam. You're everything I could possibly want."

Before Adam knew it, Amelia was lifting his chin forcing him to look her in the eye.

"Don't ever lie to me again." Amelia whispered. By now, Adam's entire body was trembling. He swallowed hard. Was he imagining this?

And then...Amelia put her lips on his. This was no regular kiss either. It was a kiss full of emotion. Anger, passion, frustration, want. Adam was completely taken aback. He had never been kissed like this before and for the first 10 seconds he was so in shock that he didn't know what to do. Once he was finally able to comprehend what was happening...

Adam slowly ran his hands up Amelia's back, stopping right in the center and pulling her closer to him. Amelia tasted so sweet, and he felt her tongue slowly pass his lips and brush against his own. His body was on fire, and the butterflies in his stomach were going crazy. He could feel Amelia's heart pounding through her chest. By now, they were both lying down, Amelia on her stomach, with half of her body covering Adam's left side. Adam's hands resting on her back, letting his finger tips gently press down every once in a while. Their lips and tongues slowly dancing with each other, savoring every moment of this bliss.

Finally, Amelia pulled away. She lifted her small hand and ran it down Adam's cheek.

"I don't care Adam...about the circumstances. I want you, and I want to be yours."

Adam looked up at her and smiled.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that." Adam said.

Amelia didn't say anything. Instead, she moved her hand, starting to put it up Adam's shirt.

"Stop." Adam tried moving away.

"Shh, it's okay." Amelia said kissing his cheek.

"O-Okay." Adam stuttered. Amelia sat up, Adam still lying down. She slowly unzipped Adam's over sized hoodie, and began to unbutton the solid gray button up he was wearing. She looked at his face for approval, he hesitantly nodded, then took a deep breath. Amelia got to the last button, and pushed his shirt aside, revealing an ace bandage wrapped tightly around his chest. At first she just stared.

"You think I'm disgusting." Adam said, barely whispering.

Amelia shook her head. She ran her finger tips lightly down from Adam's neck all the way to his waist line. She crawled back up so that she was facing him again.

"I think you're perfect." was all she said before kissing him deeply again.


End file.
